Friday, March 27, 2009

The Sinus Smashing Adventures of Shnoz Girl.

A children's book is in the making.

Just wanted to update the world today on the things that have been reaching my nostrils.
People laugh when I tell them I have big nostrils, and then they say: "You don't have big nostrils! They're normal!" As if them telling me this is going to make my nose holes shrink to normal size. It's just not happening, people. I've learned to deal with it, and so should you!

My breathing apparati should be a character in an Adventure book. I mean, whereas other people may experience frustration when they realize their pen is on the other side of the room and they need to do homework!... me, myself can simply: brace myself, position my shnoz and...inhale. Voila! Presto! Pen in hand. Or in face, if I don't time it right.

But, all that to say this...
I was walking to french class and rounding the corner near cafe a la carte when I fragranced a fragrance that exploded a memory in my head. The memory? high school cafeteria. But not in the cafeteria. Remember the way you could always smell what you were going to have for lunch when you were in trigonometry? Well, then again, maybe that was just me. ..my track record and all.

Anyway, someone had been microwaving some sort of garlic noodle mess in the community microwave in DeMoss. Does that strike anyone as odd? Here in our cathedral of learning, smack dab in the center, sits a microwave for common use.

I'm not a fan. Especially when I'm taken down memory lane to my alma mater. Though, this may be white noise as I'm realizing I may have been the only one who sniffed it. Again...seriously, look at me! Don't try to tell me they're not big. I know.

This is where I leave you. Until next time. I'll smell you before I see you.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Pause for Effect

Hello, world. Or, more accurately, all two of you who may be reading...

The most exciting thing that this day is holding...is that anytime, any minute now...My roomate will spin around in her chair, fix her gaze in my direction, wait a moment for dramatic pause and spit out in a retarted accent...
"Are you ready to watch Lord of the Rings?"

And I'll say. "Could we?"

The other exciting thing about today was that I flipped the basket on my desk over on its side and put all my fancy books (O Henry, Me Myself and Bob, ...okay that's not fancy, A Nelson Basic Reader, plaid journal and an old copy of Chaucer's Canterbury Tales) and a vase inside of it. My thought is, if I pretend I'm smart, maybe I'll be a little smarter.

Something that is not exciting about today, is that I bought a four pack of Fruit Ices in my freezer. And they...are not freezing. I mean...What am I paying these people for?! Liquid fruit...uhm, stuff? No! I think not!

Oh, I gotta go. The glorious has just happened.



Goodbye to you.